Looking for Calvin & Hobbes, by Nevin Martell

It was with much joyful anticipation that I pre-ordered this book the moment I heard about it, back in late Spring of this year. Being a huge fan of Calvin & Hobbes (like just about everyone else in the world), I longed for a glimpse behind the scenes; a look at the man and the mind behind the strip. When the day arrived that I found the book outside, near the rubbish bin, where the UPS man had carelessly and lazily tossed it instead of bringing it to the front door, I snatched it like it was a plate of dry-rubbed ribs and tore it open like a paycheck in the mail. Ensconced in my lair, I dove in.

It wasn't long before I realized I was in for a rather sizable disappointment. Primarily, it was the dull, pedestrian, safe style of the prose. It was like reading something that had been dumbed down for mass consumption by school kids and adults on a school-kid level, intellectually. Like reading a textbook from grade school that has been so expunged of any spark of creativity that you're barely able to stay awake, much less learn anything. It's a kid's ride at the carnival when you were hoping for a pants-soaking roller-coaster... it's the Star Wars: Episode 1 of biography's, in other words...

Nevertheless, I persevered, keeping this thought front and center: "If I had put a year of my life into a book, I'd hope someone would have the decency to finish the book before passing judgment on it!" So I completed it.

This is the book: Martell, the author of two unsuccessful rockstar biographies, decides he wants to profile someone else instead, cuz rock stars are lame. He decides he loves Calvin & Hobbes, and thinks he should profile its creator, in spite of the fact that Watterson is a well-known recluse, shunning publicity of any kind, even turning away seasoned journalists, much less hacks like Martell. Undaunted, he moves forward, likely knowing that, even if he doesn't get Watterson's cooperation (he doesn't, of course) there'd still be legions of C&H fans out there who will snap up his book without thought (like yours truly) and, regardless of its quality, he will have a successful book.

So, he covers the requisite background (where Watterson was born and raised), covers his transition from creative rebel drawing cartoons for his highschool paper and yearbook, to his brief stint as a political cartoonist, to his eventual success, after trial and error, with the daily strip, into his explosion as a comic superstar. Almost all of the facts and quotes are pulled from previous interviews and speeches Watterson had given early on in his career, when he could still stomach the attention. He documents Watterson's quirks, and his rabid stance against doing merchandising of any kind, and his disdain for cartoonists that do such things (in other words, everyone else).

In lieu of Watterson, Martell interviews other cartoonists, and even other famous people in other industries, so they can all go on and on about how awesome the strip was, and how talented and frustratingly weird Watterson was. He talks to childhood friends, former agents, his syndicator, and, in his final big coup, scores a phone interview with Watterson's mom. He even travels to the little Ohio town that Watterson grew up in, and wanders around the place, as if it were Jerusalem, Mecca and Times Square all rolled into one. He also has a chapter where he describes (in detail) some of his favorite C&H strips! lol In that same chapter, he covers the basics of the strip premise, in case, you know, someone accidentally picks up his book without having any clue what Calvin and Hobbes was... and he put that chapter near the end of the book!

In other words, it's mostly filler, (including many quotes used more than once) and facts people can find elsewhere without much effort. Then again, I suppose that's what a biography is supposed to be... I could easily imagine, as I read it, a disgruntled and disappointed Watterson skimming it, thinking "Here's another yahoo capitalizing on my fame."

The best thing I can say about the book is that it was an easy, brief read.

Summary: 2/5 A poor excuse. The UPS man was right to put it where he did. Whoever wants it can have it. Leave a comment and I'll arrange to mail it to you. I don't want it on my shelf. I will not risk open war.